Monday Morning Comic Review: X-men #1 by Brian Wood & Oliver Coipel

Because no one demanded it!

What? You don't like the time displaced original x-men in All New X-men? You don't like the borderline villain x-men in Uncanny X-men? The fun and pure joy of Wolverine and the X-men not good enough for you? Neither Cable and x-force or Uncanny X-force doing it for you? Well now there is a title just for you! It features characters you can already read about in all those other books! And get this it is a team made up of all WOMEN!

REVOLUTIONARY!
NOT PANDERING AT ALL!
WOULDN'T CALL IT X-WOMEN BECAUSE IT WOULDN'T SELL*!

The good: The book is pretty as hell. Seriously Coipel is at the top of his game. I can't wait for the three whole issues he's doing before there is a fill in! Also Rogue does not call a single person "Sugah," so...there is that.

The Bad: Pretty much everything else. I mean John Sublime? Who cares. John Sublime tracks Jubilee from Bulgaria to NYC via commercial airline because he does not have time to get a private jet. Gets to Grand Central Station, and for some reason cannot discern where young Jubilee is headed...because y'know, where the hell would a former x-man in Grand Central be headed? You know what he does? He goes to the payphone that jubilee just used AND HITS REDIAL BECAUSE THAT IS SOMETHING THAT EXISTS ON PAYPHONES. This guy who has been around since the start of life on earth could not figure out she was heading to Westchester from a train station that exclusively travels north. Oh, and Captain i cannot wait for a private jet from Bulgaria somehow charters a helicopter to take him from Grand Central to Westchester faster than the Metro North Train.

Essentially Brian Wood is phoning it in. Much like his Ultimate X-men, this is nonsensical, kinda scattershot, and boring as hell. It is pretty much a waste of Coipel's talents. Wood is always best when he is creating something he is passionate about. I think he's burned out on X characters. You think he'd at least be passionate about a paycheck.

Oh, and the Manara variant cover is fantastic. Except that they allowed the stupid "Marvel Now" red bar across the bottom which a)obscures the art on a goddamn Milo Manara piece and b)none of the other Manara covers published over the last month or so have this graphic design flaw. Pretty sure someone should be fired for that alone.



*(Public reason: It would be disrespectful to the characters to classify them purely by gender. [Although they juuuust released an x-women tpb by milo manara. And really they could have called it XX-Men]).

The m word is the new n word

In a recent issue of marvel comics' Uncanny Avengers, Alex Summers, aka Havok, stated that he, as well as the mutant community at large, no longer wanted to be called "mutants". He states that this label is divisive, and that at the end of the day we are all human, and should accept each other as such.

Wow. Good stuff. It continues the long standing history of the X-men being an analog to the struggle for equal rights by, at this point, various groups in U.S. history. The concept of "we dont want to be separate, we dont even want separate but equal, we want to be equal." This is Marvel's mutants taking a stand!

Then the internet fucking exploded.

Blog upon blog, and site upon site picked up on the story...and how it was offensive.

Wait. What?

Yes, apparently Havok's desire to be seen as equal is the most offensive thing ever!

My personal favorite quote comes from a tumblr called Off Center Fold:
     " Translation: If I am no longer
     affiliated with my minority status,
      you will accept me as one of you
     and we can all ignore that big
      reeking pile of oppression you
     heave on blacks, gays, trans* folk
      — yeah, pretty much anyone who
      isn’t Rick Remender. Because it’s
      not an entiresociety lording its
      ignorance, racism, homophobia,
     transphobia, and general lack of
     willingness to tolerate any culture
     but their misguided assumption
     of what makes an American that’s
     the problem! It’s the “M-word”s
     that minorities use to ‘alienate’
     themselves! Call me “Alex” and
     you don’t have to face that I’m a
     mutant (or gay, black, trans*, etc.)
     If you can’t tolerate the can
     because of its label, strip the
     packaging off and pretend it’s no
     different than all the other ones!"

I've been long under the impression that people did not want to be seen as their minority status. That women in the workplace did not want to be "women" in the workplace, but "co-workers" in the workplace. That an african american chef didnt want to be "the black cook" but just "that amazing chef." That the "gay" teacher just be "mr. O'leary the fucking awesome chem professor."

Have we moved into a world where people WANT to be EXCLUSIVELY identified by minority labels? How does that make anything work? How do we progress from there? In the above paragraph, the woman is still a woman, the african american still has his heritage, and mr. O'leary's (hopefully someday soon legally) husband is waiting for him at home with take out and a movie.

The people who are offended by this, are small minded people who do not know how to be anything other than the minority labels they apply to themselves. Your gender, race, orientation or really any other single aspect of you does not define the entirety of who you are. When you allow it to, you see injustice in everything, including acceptence.

Havok still has his x-gene, he is still a mutant, he just wants, when you look at him, that that not be the first thing the pops into your brain. That is what everyone has ever wanted, and now you find fault with it.

Although my opinion does not count since i am a straight white man.